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President Obama: lazy detached supervillian conspiring against America

by: Eric B.

Fri Jun 20, 2014 at 10:52:06 AM EDT

The Detroit News published a carefully research, exhaustive psychological study this morning of an American president wrought by an endless stream of difficulties. Okay, I lied. Fried Chicken Frank wrote a column in which he pulls back the veil of our first Dorian Gray president and sees a madman looking back at him, a lazy, shiftless, detached president who none-the-less is conspiring to allow our enemies to infiltrate American government at its highest levels to bring it down for some reason.

As the United States seems to aimlessly swirl through a vortex of serious national and international problems, American citizens appear perplexed by a lack of Washington action to halt the turmoil.

Other Americans know that this is probably going to loop in the game of golf.


Eric B. :: President Obama: lazy detached supervillian conspiring against America

We are witnessing a president who doesn’t want to protect the nation’s borders, who now opposes a terrorist group in Iraq that he supported in Syria, who uses executive orders to create an empire, who seeks to punish those who oppose his radical politics, and who seems more interested in his next round of golf than attending to the benefit of a nation that entrusted him with the most important office in the world.

In the space of one paragraph, we learn that the president is actively working against the best interests of the nation at large ... while being too distracted by golf to do his job.

As President Barack Obama’s approval rating plummets — it’s at a low point of 41 percent in a poll this week by NBC and the Wall Street Journal — conventional political wisdom says an incumbent would seek to reverse the trend.

That conventional wisdom fails to account if the incumbent is deliberately seeking to sabotage the country, while neglecting his duties to play golf, however.

But Obama shows no sign of changing. Instead, the president seems to have floored the accelerator toward the kind of fundamental American change he promised just days before his first election in 2008.

It's either towards destroying America from within, or accelerating towards another round of golf. I'm sure Fried Chicken Frank won't allow this piece of cognitive dissonance go unaddressed.

All of his actions make one thing clear.

That what we're about to be exposed to is a laundry list of old and tired rightwing complaints about the president.

We’re now witnessing the real Obama, not the one who had to polish his image and portray himself as a unifier in order to gain enough votes to win two elections.

Almost as if by magic, this "new" Obama looks almost exactly like the Obama that the rightwing has been raving existed for years.

The teeth have now been bared on a man who has decried the American Constitution as a “charter of negative liberties,” who has worked as a Saul Alinsky inspired community organizer, and whose academic credentials include studies at Columbia University where a pair of professors — Richard Cloward and Frances Fox Piven — advocated a strategy for overloading the federal welfare system with so many participants that the U.S. economy would collapse into a reliance on government to distribute a guaranteed annual income as an answer to poverty.

What, no mention of William Ayers?

The mask is off a president who sacrifices the interests of our country at large for the political gain of support for his own party, now populated by elitist statists who have followed Obama blindly, even to the point of using the federal government — specifically the IRS — to harm political opponents through an abuse of power.

Except when he's neglecting the country to play golf.

Recent events alone are breathtaking, and lay bare any claims that we have a president trying to unite a nation based on constitutionally based goals of freedom and safety.

It appears that Fried Chicken Frank has mistaken certain verses from The Book of Revelation for the morning newspaper.

While al-Qaida terrorists marched on Iraq, the president entertained the LGBT community, honored a group of illegal immigrant children at the White House, and belittled opponents of the man-made climate change hoax before racing off to his latest round of golf at an exclusive resort.

What kind of dastardly villain ignores the problems in a foreign country by addressing domestic social issues?

While American veterans waited for medical treatment at government VA hospitals, the president released five high level terrorists from the Guantanamo Bay facility in exchange for the release of a man who’s been accused by other soldiers of being a U.S. military deserter.

Who would have thought that a prisoner exchange common in modern warfare was really part of an Alinsky-like plot to release terrorists in exchange for a man already convicted by conservatives of desertion under fire.

While setting new rules to limit the force used by American border patrol agents who risk their lives to protect our nation’s boundaries, Obama uses military facilities to house tens of thousands of children whom he’s encouraged to brave their own lives to cross our borders illegally.

Instead, he should have let the Border Patrol gun down chilidren, like any decent American.

And while he spends a college commencement address talking about man-made climate change, he tells another audience that those immigrants represent the future of America, never mind that they apparently aren’t considered the key to the future of their own downtrodden countries like Nicaragua, El Salvador and Honduras.

Nobody tell Fried Chicken Frank about the goof Castro pulled on Jimmy Carter. That's hit 'em right in the Zone Bar.


What has emboldened Obama to act so unilaterally and impose such unpopular policies?

One is tempted to point to a Congress that, in the case of climate change, has actively sabotaged any effort to address the problem through proper legislation. One suspects that Fried Chicken Frank would wave off such a suggestion as if it were a pesky gnat.

The answer seems simple, even for amateur psychologists: The president only has two and a half years remaining to cement his legacy. And he wants it to be of a man who fundamentally changed America, just as he promised to do in 2008.

And there is no human being that draws breath a more amatuerish psychologist than Fried Chicken Frank.

Obama couldn’t act so unilaterally and boldly in his first term because he faced a reelection bid in 2012.

Also, he was busy playing lots of golf.

But now he bears no political risk for imposing his will and running roughshod over our Constitution.

Like the lazy, detached Manchurian candidate Muslim that he is.

Obama says those that don’t believe in man-made climate change are like those who think the moon is made of cheese.

I have a feeling that something entirely nonsensical is coming.

If that’s true, then those who don’t appreciate his systematic dismantling of America as we knew it must believe that the tooth fairy left Santa Claus enough quarters to buy gifts for the Easter Bunny to distribute in the spring.

Copy and paste this and bring it out at parties for everyone, especially fans of the English language, to admire.

We can only hope that the damage Obama leaves behind in 2017 is not irreversible.

The world as we know it teeters at the brink of utter annihilation!

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Time for another lesson in the Fantasy Camp Constitution
Today's topic is the Beckmann Doctrine: Any private citizen can introduce articles of impeachment, provided he or she is sufficiently angry and has a sufficiently large audience*. Expertise in logic, sentence structure, or constitutional law is not required.

* I've always envisioned Beckmann's audience as the meanest, most racist homeowners in Macomb County, the kind who move their lips when they read.

A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always count on the support of Paul.

Now that Magic Frank is off U-M Football
Frank can revel in his full craziness now that he's no longer forced to maintain the standards expected of someone representing U-M football.  

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